The past few months have been most enlightening, and trying, and today, of all days, I’m just feeling a bit over it all.
And by “it all”, I mean everything – work, family, relationships, hobbies… It’s all just feeling a bit blah and gray. I am going through the motions–one does have obligations–but I’m not very involved in the process.
I am currently juggling four different women, but this is not in a bad way. I’m in the “talking to”/”chatting up” stage, you know, the little three-step waltz of “she likes me, she likes me not, she likes me maybe”. They range in height, weight, race, education, background, neighborhood, values, personality, hobbies, interests, and occupation. We’ve got a medic, a photographer, a linguist, a teacher in there; former ballet dancer, a gamer, a student, a baker — some like movies, some don’t, some write handwritten notes, some text constantly, Instagram has reared its head as have other items… They are all very attractive, engaging, and clever. They are great.
As a whole, and individually, all perfectly lovely.
And I, well, I am perfectly bored. Not just with them, but also with my ex, with my best friend, with my job, with my family–
All of it is just putting me to sleep. It’s all noise. I don’t want to read anymore books. I don’t want to write anymore. I don’t care to read the news or chat about it. I don’t care for celebrity gossip. Even my paranoid theories (Skynet, the impending annexation of Canada, and the cultural apocalypse that has been heralded by Snapchat Stories) don’t even interest me anymore, topics which normally could have me ranting for days and now, well…
I kind of just want to buy a bottle of Scotch, put on my orange UT sweatpants, turn on the new season of House of Cards, and drink until either the new season is finished or I pass out. Maybe eat some Hot Pockets.