Do you remember us? It seems very long ago but it wasn’t, maybe two or three seasons, at most the passing of one spiral around the sun, and there was an us to chatter about and then too quickly a not-us to be at a loss about.
Love, which I think we both very much wanted at the time, with each other, requires unashamed honesty and openness to receiving it. I had too much shame to be honest about me (my wants, my needs, my real needs) and you had too much shame to believe you deserved to receive it (you clutched that cross and I felt it tines in my palms). The only thing we could have done is exactly what we did: break each other.
I broke you open and it all came spilling out. And you broke me open and I finally saw light.
I am here today with her because of you and that is not a loss for either of us. Those outside looking in would be baffled by that, but you, darling, you know what I mean – I know you do. Because right now, right this very second, you are ready for what comes next, and I will always be with you, every step of the way, because I will never, ever stop thanking you for our brief intertwining.
You have changed me and my world. I hope I can do no less in return for you.
(you deserve it, you deserve it, you deserve it – we both do)